Six Common Questions about Funeral Etiquette

Mangano Family Funeral Homes • June 20, 2022

Are you confused about what to wear, how to act, and what to bring to a funeral? Follow these funeral etiquette guidelines to properly express your sympathy. 

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Funerals and memorial services are important steps in celebrating life after death. These events are also a respectable way to express sympathy and offer condolences to the grieving family and friends. Our funeral homes in North Babylon, NY host these events to provide families with ease of planning as they say goodbye and honor their loved ones. When attending a funeral, there are a few things you should know about what to wear, how to act, and what to bring. These are some of the most common questions to help understand proper funeral etiquette. 


What should I wear? 


Traditionally, black is the known color of mourning. Many people will wear black to a funeral, but it is not the only option. It is also respectful to wear any darker shades, like blues and grays. When choosing your outfit, be sure to dress modestly. Avoid wearing low-neckline tops, tennis shoes, ripped apparel, and any other revealing or worn clothing. 


Do I need to bring a card? 


Sympathy cards can be left at the funeral home for the grieving family, or they can be sent directly to their home. Although this is not required, it is another way to express your sympathy to the family and friends of the deceased. When sending a card, it is recommended to mail the card within two weeks of the death. 


Should I bring flowers? 


Many people will offer their condolences by sending flowers to the funeral home for display during the service. Instead of bringing them with you, make these arrangements with the florist in advance. You may see the phrase “in lieu of flowers” in the obituary, which will provide you with an alternative way to show support, like making a donation. 


What should I say? 


Do not fret if talking about your emotions does not come easily to you. When you attend a funeral service, offer simple words of sympathy to the grieving family and friends. A simple “I’m sorry” accompanied by a sincere hug or handshake will suffice. Many people will also encourage you to share positive memories or experiences you have with the deceased. Keep the conversation light and brief. 


How long should I stay? 



Most of the guests at a funeral viewing will only stay between 15-20 minutes to express their condolences. Immediate family and long-time friends may stay longer to greet all their guests. 


Do I have to approach the casket? 


Funeral services with open caskets allow guests to say their goodbyes to the deceased. This leaves the space for you to say a prayer if you wish. However, this is not a requirement. It is not considered ill-mannered or rude if you choose to not approach the casket. 


Wearing the right attire and behaving the proper way can make all the difference in your attendance at a funeral or memorial service. When it comes time to honor your loved ones or offer your sympathy at funeral homes in North Babylon, NY, be sure to follow these etiquette guidelines to properly celebrate the life lost. 


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